"FUCK DUDE!" screamed Sarah "Not really! Keep it in your fucking panties, OK? None of us want to see that shit."Simon nodded and sheepishly re-buckled his belt. A few minutes later he excused himself and headed up to his room, crouching over to hide his erection. As soon as his bedroom door closed we all burst out laughing. Emily asked what was going on and we told her about Simon and his fake dildo dick, and she laughed hardest of all. That night Emily drank a bottle of vodka and deep throated a cucumber in front of us both (We had to stop her from going and asking Simon for a borrow of his dildo), so we knew she was one of us.One night in October I was in my room getting changed ready to go out to the Union and as I was about to pull off my t-shirt I heard what sounded like heavy breathing coming from Simon's bedroom, which was next to mine. I stopped undressing and nonchalantly crossed the room towards the dividing wall where I heard Simon mutter "Come on you dirty little emo slut,. A small group of first years occupied their table in the corner, puzzling over what to write for their history essay - twelve inches of parchment on the Great Congress of 1627 - wondering if Professor Binns would notice if they copied out of an old textbook. Nearby, Crookshanks was playing with a mouse she'd caught, letting the poor creature almost escape over and over again, only to reel in the suffering rodent at the last possible instant. Harry and Ron watched with some interest."It's a bit like you playing with the golden snitch," said Ron. "Except I never feel sorry for the snitch." Should we stop it?" asked Harry. It did seem rather cruel, after all."I'm not sure we should," replied Ron. "I think Crookshanks relies on what she can catch for food, because she doesn't seem to care for the table scraps Hermione gives her. It's not very nice for the mouse, but I'd hate to see the cat go hungry." That's true enough," said Harry. "But there's another way to end this." He pointed his.
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